Mourning Jade
by Moxxy
Summary: Beck awakes in the middle of the night to a teary-eyed Jade. Sad Bade Oneshot...


Beck awoke that night to his wife's gentle sobs that she had tried to muffle by burying her face in her pillow. However, this tactic failed, and Beck was awoken by her cries regardless. "Jade" he said drowsily while lifting his head slowly from his pillow. He was finally brought to full consciousness and his heart was filled with remorse at the sight of his wife's tears.

Jade lay with her face down, buried shamefully in her pillow until she heard Becks voice say her name. She turned with teary eyes to face him and, at the sight of his concerned look, immediately began to wipe her tear-stained face. "Oh, Beck... I'm fine; go back to sleep"

Beck could see right passed her brave face to all the pain she was feeling inside. "No you're not, Jade"

Jade no longer fought to play it cool. He knew her better than anyone else did and there was no point in hiding her emotions from him. She lowered her head in shame and plainly stared down at the sheets that covered the mattress they lay on. Beck grabbed for her hand until she finally made eye contact with him. He slightly tugged on her hand, gesturing for her to scoot closer to him, which she did. He pulled her in close to him, wrapping his arms securely around her small frame. She hesitantly returned his embrace before finally gripping his torso tightly and began to cry hysterically in the crook of his neck.

"It's just not fair" she sobbed.

Beck's heart wrenched, immediately knowing what she was upset about. He heard his wife continue, not caring that her voice continued to crack between words. "I carried her in my stomach for 5 months and now..."

Jade trailed off, not being able to bring herself to speak the words; to admit aloud that two short days ago, they had lost their unborn child. Beck just continued holding her in his arms, tracing circles in her back soothingly. "I'll never get to feed her, or kiss her; or hold her in my arms..."

Beck felt a few tears begin to sting his eyes also. He had cried a multitude of tears- even more than Jade had- the day they lost their baby girl. At the time, Jade was numb. Her heart had been reacting with pure shock to what was going on. Now, it was Beck's turn to be numb while Jade finally broke.

However, his numbness was beginning to wear off as Jade's words began to hit home for him. He'd never be able to hold his daughter in his arms. He'd never kiss her or take her to a baseball game or even walk her down the aisle... He and Jade would never have the privilege of watching their little girl grow up and to watch her develope into the beautiful woman they knew she would have grown to be.

"...And it's all my fault..." He heard Jade state sadly.

Beck ceased rubbing her back. He gripped her shoulders and pulled her back slightly so that he could see her face. "No" he stated firmly with tears in his eyes. "Don't you say that, Jade. It's not your fault. You heard the doctor; these things happen. There's no way we could have predicted this"

Jade heaved deep breaths, knowing he was right. However, his words just weren't enough to heal her now broken heart. "Then how come I feel so bad? I just feel like she it was my responsibility to protect her. She was _inside _of me. It was my job to keep this from happening and I didn't!" She began sobbing harder than ever, leaning into Beck's chest. He heard her manage through her muffled sobs "I'm sorry. I'm just so sorry"

Beck adjusted his grip on her, wrapping his arms around her tighter while rocking her back and forth. He was no longer able to curb his own tears. It was impossible to stay numb while seeing the love of his life in so much pain. "It's not your fault, Jade. It's going to be okay" he cooed into her ear softly. "You have me… We have each other; It's going be okay"

_**() () ()**_

Jade and Beck must have stayed that way in each other's arms for hours. Before they knew it, streams of sunshine began pouring in through the blinds of their windows. They both now lay on their backs, side by side and staring at the ceiling. Beck kept his arm around Jade protectively.

"What would we have named her?" Beck questioned his wife, still not making eye contact with her as they stared at the ceiling.

Jade was silent for a good three minutes as if she had been lost in deep thought. "Jezreel", suddenly Beck heard her voice fill the room with the single word.

He turned to meet her eyes and she did the same. He gave her a weak, sad smile. "Nice"

She nodded her head, trying to hold back the new tears that threatened to fall from her gray orbs.

"It's a beautiful name..." he spoke once again "But maybe we can save it for our next child. I kind of had another name picked out for this one..."

"Oh..." she frowned slightly, but then asked curiously, "What name?"

"Jade"

Her eyes widened; now allowing a single tear to stream down her face. Jade turned to look at Beck beside her and gave him a broken yet sincere smile. "Really?"

Beck nodded. "I think she deserves to be named after you. Because I always imagined that our daughter would grow up to be a truly amazing woman; just like you"

Jade smiled brightly through her tears. "Thank you" she bade quietly.

Beck wrapped his arm around her a bit tighter in a comforting manner, pulling her close before planting a kiss on her head. "I love you, Jade" he said in a voice so dreamily.

And at that moment, Jade realized her husband was referring to both her and their unborn child whom they both imagined was watching down on them from heaven.

"We love you too... Don't we, Jade?" She said, also referring to their now angelic daughter.

Suddenly, they both heard the light pitter-patter of rain pouring down outside. Jade would now forever take the rain as a sign that their daughter was listening to her parents down below express their love for her, and happy that now that she was not with them… at least they had each other.


End file.
